Part of the ocean...

A small story i read in the book Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom (one of the best books i have read so far)

The story is about a little wave, bobbing along in the ocean, having a grand old time. He's enjoying the wind and the fresh air- until he notices the other waves in front of him, crashing against the shore. "My God, this is terrible" the wave says. "Look whats going to happen to me !" Then along comes another wave. It sees the first wave, looking grim, and it says to him, " Why do you look so sad?" The first wave says, " You don't understand! We are all going to crash! All of us waves are going to be nothing! Isn't it terrible?" The second wave says, "No , you don't understand! You are not a wave, you are part of the ocean.

I do not believe that i fully grasp the meaning of this allegory, but from whatever i interpreted of it, it has had a humbling effect on me.

Being In Twenties Something *

It is when you stop going along with the crowd and start realizing that there are many things about yourself that you didn't know and may not like. You start feeling insecure and wonder where you will be in a year or two, but then get scared because you barely know where you are now.

You start realizing that people are selfish and that, maybe, those friends that you thought you were so close to aren't exactly the greatest people you have ever met, and the people you have lost touch with are some of the most important ones. What you don't recognize is that they are realizing that too, and aren't really cold, catty, mean or insincere, but that they are as confused as you.

You look at your job... and it is not even close to what you thought you would be doing, or maybe you are looking for a job and realizing that you are going to have to start at the bottom and that scares you.

Your opinions have gotten stronger. You see what others are doing and find yourself judging more than usual because suddenly you realize that you have certain boundaries in your life and are constantly adding things to your list of what is acceptable and what isn't. One minute, you are insecure and then the next, secure.

You laugh and cry with the greatest force of your life. You feel alone and scared and confused. Suddenly, change is the enemy and you try and cling on to the past with dear life, but soon realize that the past is drifting further and further away, and there is nothing to do but stay where you are or move forward.

You get your heart broken and wonder how someone you loved could do such damage to you. Or you lie in bed and wonder why you can't meet anyone decent enough that you want to get to know better. Or maybe you love someone but love someone else too and cannot figure out why you're doing this because you know that you aren't a bad person. One night stands and random hook ups start to look cheap. Getting wasted and acting like an idiot starts to look pathetic. You go through the same emotions and questions over and over, and talk with your friends about the same topics because you cannot seem to make a decision. You worry about loans, money, the future and making a life for yourself...

and while winning the race would be great, right now you'd just like to be a contender!

What you may not realize is that every one reading this relates to it. We are in our best of times and our worst of times, trying as hard as we can to figure this whole thing out.

We call it the "Quarter-life Crisis."

*[This article has been "inspired" (a euphemism for copied word to word) from an email i received. I just wanted it to be on my blog, so here it is......]

Different Gods...So Many Of Them

OK, this is something which occurred to me while reading this book by Kiran Desai "The Inheritance of Loss". One of the characters in the book, Harish-Harry, is someone whose trying to live two lives at the same time (my interpretation....might differ from the author's). Trying to please two gods at the same time so that when the time comes of Knocking at Heaven's door, he's allowed to pass irrespective of the god whose assigned to evaluate him.(this conviction "of mine" is based on the fact that since there are so many gods, so many religions, each different god is assigned( through consensus of course) the role of the patriarch of a particular religion).
So i just started wondering, what if one has prayed, idolised one god all his lifetime and when he reaches those coveted doors, he finds someone else standing there waiting to evaluate him.Some one he didn't even know existed. What happens then?Will he be let through?

Well the guy had been plain stupid for having kept faith in just one god!! When the odds were so heavily stacked against him, what with so many of gods to please, he should have at least kept few more of them as his potential bets. He might have lived a very honest and virtuous life, but to what avail? The god he was so very much trying to appease, wasn't even there to welcome him to the heavens above.

So what should one do, to live a peaceful life up above, once he's done living the one here?He can either try and please as many gods as he possibly can thereby increasing his chances of meeting the right or desired god when the time comes. But in the course , losing his peace of mind. Or he can live his life on the following two principles:
(i) Stop living your life as a means to an end.Live it not to please someone but to please only yourself.
(ii) And who cares whether its heaven up there or hell.As long as you are here, make this your heaven.

The Resurrection

The title may seem heavy, but that is what is happening..Although my initial blogging days did not last long, this time i plan to be much more committed and regular...And this time, its got to do more with the superfluousness of time than anything else.
So now sit back and enjoy coz the blogs now are gonna me much more interesting,and also ...please do visit my other blog as well..i.e. debaters-haven.blogspot.com and help me move beyond my first post there...

the agony of it all

iam a very sour loser....i simply fail to accept defeat...who doesn't right.....but i just dont accept it graciously enough...i become bitter....that too losing at something am so egotistical about.....people might say how callow of me to make something so nonsensical ( for them ) my ego but then this is me.....and i hate losing it......
this is something about me which i have been trying to change for a very long time now.....i mean there are things much more important and much more sensible than this in life..right.... and after everything said and done, at the end of the day, it is, just a game......
but then i think why should i change...every one of us pride ourselves in something or the other, however small, however trite....and why shouldn't one....ofcourse as time passes, priorities change, egoes change, but there should always be a sense of pride in the small little gifts god gives us as our talents, keeping in mind never to get overwhelmed by them....

there was this line in the movie rockford...''dont recongnize failure''....heres my addition to it..''dont recognize failure, but whenever you do happen to meet it (which is gonnna happen quite often), dont budge out from saying hello and acknowledging it.''

the journey (17th july)

The harsh sound of the train’s whistle wakes me up from my melancholy……the scene in front of me, obscured a few moments ago by overpowering ennui, starts to come back into focus…its 2.30 am and the place is still full of activity…tatanagar railway station…..that’s where am at the moment…desperately waiting for the dawn to break so that I can catch the ranchi bound bus…..(yup, its those parts of the world where travelling at night even today can be fraught with life threatening situations…)…and am back to doing what lately I have started to do quiet often…..penning down my thoughts…..but today even thoughts seem to elude me…..its just one of those days when the mind simply goes blank, shunning out anything and everything within the realms of contemplation…I look around in a hope to pick up something interesting……with so much going around, am bound to...… but my eyes come to rest on the imposing digital clock, the two dots in the middle blinking for eternity…..these are the moments when one realizes that time can actually come to a standstill…..

Its 3.30 am and this is all what I have managed to write down….with the laptop battery now running out and the drowsiness at its peak, i decide to let the mind wander in the blankness of it all…..maybe it will stumble onto something worthwhile......

An earnest request....

This message has been created in public interest....all those visiting this blog(and specially for those even reading the posts) are earnestly requested to kindly click on the google ads being displayed adjacent to my postings.....whenever you click on the links, google pays some money (a few cents i guess) to college-going-students charity home (a non-profitable charity organization involved in d altruistic endeavor of supporting the poor college going students for their day to day needs .

On my way to becoming an Escribitionist.....

well heres my first post on my very own blog......blog, as most people know it(or dont..) is a portmanteau of the words web and log....the blogging syndrome (for want of words) started way back in 1994 and in may 2007 blog search engine technorati was tracking more than 71 million blogs..whoa....(thats roughly the population of Egypt).....so much so for internet becoming a household name i say....neways enough trivia on blogging i guess....

now the reason i got caught onto this syndrome(n trust me it ain't the superfluousness of time or to put it in simpler terms joblessness...) was writing was something that had always eluded me....an art which always seemed to be cached somewhere beyond my scope of penetration....so i thought well lets hit the nail on the head....

and as far as the name is concerned..serendipities...i don't know but somehow this word has just etched itself in some deep region of my otherwise gaunt brains and inexorably resurfaces whenever am in search of a new word (novelty..ehhh).....and there it was again with never failing fidelity when i was searching for the header for my first ever blog page.....

and to end the first post i would like to quote (keeping with the description of the page)...."who was the first guy who looked at a cow and said i will drink whatever comes out of those things when i squeeze them".......get more inane i say!!!!!!